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Well, my faithful jacket, which has served me since high school, making it about 8 years old, has finally had to be retired, owing to the holes in the pockets which have made losing my wallet/keys a great liability as of late. So yesterday, I started searching for a jacket, with a budget of $50 for a light spring jacket, my main requirements being that it be warm enough for spring and autumn, but lightweight enough for summer, attractive enough for me to wear it in professional settings, fit properly, and be waterproof (I’m going to be a British Columbian soon)

But I’ve noticed, during my combing of the secondhand clothing stores, that it is damn near impossible for me to find a coat that has pockets in it. At least when I shop in the women’s section, the men’s clothing has plenty of pockets, nice deep ones too, perfect for carrying a wallet, an ID, and various other little things one needs throughout their day.

This appears to be a crafty conspiracy among fashion companies to try and get me to start carrying a purse. Heretics! A purse is a rather bad idea for someone as forgetful as me, I could easily leave it in a movie theater, hanging over a chair at a restaurant, or under my seat at a university lecture hall. Purses are pretty much designed for people who don’t have so much going on in their brain at once, and can remember that oh-so-important thing under their chair. Plus, unlike a trusty student tote-bag, purses tend to be far too tiny for me to cram books I’m reading into them, so they serve no purpose that a pocket doesn’t. Plus, they’re expensive.

This is ridiculous. If I could find a men’s coat which didn’t fit so as to make me look like Gloria Allred in the shoulder area, then I’d just buy that. But if I don’t find a jacket that fits me, then I’ll just buy a pocket-free coat, and then buy a new tote-bag with compartments, so I can carry my essentials, but also have a book or two stored in it. That will make it heavy enough so I’m not likely to forget it in bad places or lose it, especially since I care a lot more about books than I do my other possessions, in another bad habit of mine.

For the record, this pocket complaint also applies to women’s pants.