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Ever hear someone describe someone else, usually a woman, as having “curves in all the right places”? That little phrase irritates me as badly as a canker sore you can’t help but bump your tongue up against. It’s the most irksome attempt at a “compliment” I’ve ever heard.

I think what I hate most about it is that it implies that there’s a “right” type of curves to have, which can only occur in certain places on someone’s body, and that everything else is just unwanted extras which have no place on an attractive body. I call bullshit on that. There are a multitude of attractive bodies, some have many curves, some have none. If you say someone has “curves in all the right places”, I can’t help but think that you have a definition of beauty that is far too narrow for my liking, even if I myself fit into it.

That’s your regularly scheduled rant from me while I finish packing up and writing essays and powerpoints for awesome organizations.