>I woke up puking this morning. I believe I might have caught a bug from a friend of mine’s kid.
This isn’t the first time this has happened; I’ve been struggling with illness this entire semester. For a while, I struggled to figure out exactly why I was getting so sick, but as of this morning, the reason dawned on me. It wasn’t because I was necessarily getting exposed to more germs than before, as I initially suspected. I believe now that my immune system has been weakened due to stress.
I am willing to admit it, I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately. I’ve been trying to hold together my personal, activist, and academic life, and it’s been experiencing some wild changes. Between transferring to UVic and scrambling to collect enough money to pay for all the fees involved, collecting course outlines, dealing with my girlfriend’s transition, feeling overwhelmed by having to leave Missoula, and wondering about my future are all causing my health to deteriorate. It affects my ability to sleep, which interferes with my ability to fight off illness and function in school. It’s not as terrible as some health problems I have faced during the last four years at UM, but it has been enough to make it difficult for me to perform my duties as a student and an activist.
Nobody who knows me can accuse me of being lazy, far from it. But sometimes my health takes a toll and I’m required to withdraw, for the sake of my body and mind, or I push myself too far and find myself…. hugging the toilet. I wish things were different, but I feel like I need to re-evaluate how much work I’ve been doing, and consider maybe dropping a few less-important things in my life so I don’t end up collapsing.